quiet reflection

jesus, i am resting, resting in the joy of what thou art
i am finding out the greatness of thy loving heart.

today......
my husband lost his father.
my children lost their grandfather.
i lost a hero.

i don't think i could love this man any more if he were my own father. this man that loved me generously with abandon....he loved my kids that way too. he loved his own children, his wife, his city. i feel like i said some of these same words about my husband's grandfather.... but this man i knew intimately. he built me a home, he raised his son to be my amazing husband, he loved his wife for over 35 years and showed my husband how to love a wife...... and boy did he love jesus. he loved jesus in such a way that it shaped the way he lived every part of his life....and man did he pray. tuesdays were my day... the day he prayed for our family, our church, our network, our marriage, our children.... for peanut's need for patience; for little bit's to survive to his third birthday; for sweetpea to keep growing.

tuesday night (only 24 hours ago), we called him after dinner. peanut was struggling with self-control. we called to see if g'ma could remember the "self-control" song. we got g'pa who didn't remember that particular song, but did remember the "patience" song. we put him on speaker phone and this is what he sang:

have patience, have patience; don't be in such a hurry.
when you get impatient it only makes you worry.
remember, remember that god is patient, too
just remember all the times that others have to wait for you.

what a sweet memory to have.
i am mostly sad because my children don't quite understand the extent of what was lost this morning. i rejoice because i am thankful to have had my life shaped by this man.

Comments

kate o. said…
oh, kathy. my heart is hurting for you all. know we are praying for you and john and kids and all your family.
Dave said…
Oh, Kathy! I am so sorry! This sounds so unexpected! He was so young. Kathy, I feel so shocked to hear this news and so, so sad for your family. Of course, as always, if there is anything I can do...take the boys off your hands for a little while...bake...you know, PLEASE tell me.
patti said…
Im so sorry to hear this K. Beautiful tribute to a man who is now in the presence of a Holy Almighty amazing God. And still, he is wanted here. What a wonderful testimony and legacy he leaves behind. I love you sweet girl xo
Terri Deal said…
Sweet Family - Please know that Richard and I are praying for you all! We met John's dad briefly while he was there working on the new home when we came to NY from Charlotte to learn about the Brooklyn Project. I have followed your blog since then as a way to originally keep up with the renovations but since to just keep up on your family life. So please know that the whole Stonebridge Church family is praying for you all. The Deal's
jeanette said…
I just keep saying "oh my gosh" "oh my gosh". I'm SO sorry for your loss. I just can't imagine.

I remember meeting him when I came out for your wedding..and being jealous of the family you were marrying into-they were all just so sold out for Jesus.

what a legacy this man has left.

and now he is sitting at the feet of the Lord whom he has served.
Debby Sutton said…
Kath - Oh my gosh.

I met him when I did those Pampered Chef parties for Gretchen. He would come into the kitchen and wonder, "Where is my new 8" saute pan? I have just ruined my last one this morning making my eggs, and I need a new one!"

My heart breaks for you all. My insides are tightening and I'm wiping away the tears. It reminds me of what really pulls my heart when I think of my children, they'll never know my dad. I feel it for you.
Dennis F. said…
Heart-tugging words. Thank you for them. My ordinary thoughts have been interrupted many times in the past two days with extraordinary thoughts of John Sr. Of John, the son, for whom my heart absolutely breaks. Of the kids, who will not be able to enjoy their wonderful grandfather. Of his wife and family who have lost their anchor. And I reflect on my own life and its fragility - I'm nearly the same age as he.
Amy said…
The great sadness is tempered by the legacy this man of God has left and the lives he has touched. My heart is heavy with your loss, what you feel now and what you will feel months from now. Praying for comfort for all.

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