a life beyond running shoes.

i have a new book group. it is pretty much all i have read this year.  wow, this year is different from last.  i poured myself into my books last year.... this year i don't seem to have the time. i guess that is a good thing considering the previous year was a move and lost of transition.  it is a good thing.  here are my book club reads: the invisible bridge by julie orringer (which we all appreciated the historical context and insight into hungary during WWII) girl in translation by jean kwok (provided a much deeper discussion than read but a worthy insight into a immigrant experience) the unlikely lavender queen by jeannie ralston run with the horsemen by ferrol sams (i am determined to finish this) my discipleship group read: celebration of the disciplines by richard foster give them grace by elyse fitzpatrick & jessica thompson my summer reads: looking for alaska by john green the woman upstairs by claire messud and other books:...

but i finished the LA marathon last sunday morning while my family sat in church. i can honestly say i am was not sure that i would have but sweet friend, T, pulled me through every step of that blasted marathon!!! we were shooting for a 4:30 (4 hours and 30 minutes) finish time. mom and dennis took us to the start (traffic to dodger stadium will be another post). we got to the starting line 3 minutes before the gun went off.  we were behind the corrals where the handy dandy pace groups were situated.  somewhere in there we passed the 4:45 group.  then somewhere in there we managed to pass the 4:30 group.  i was pretty darn pleased with us.  we were feeling good.  mom and dennis saw us at miles 6....  then saw us at mile 12...... then saw us at mile 17...... where i know i was not feeling good and was starting to worry that with over an hour and a half left to the race, i would not be able to finish.   then the 4:30 pace grou...

i will finish the year with my last books read.... over the last month or so.  i have not even sat down to write my xmas letter and yet i post about my final reads....  happy 2013! global girlfriends: how one mom made it her business to help women poverty by stacey edgar what a fun and amazing story about a woman who started with a vision to do something about poverty among women around the world. check our her website: www.globalgirlfriends.com  making peace with the land by fred bahnson and norman wirzba a scholor and a practision discussing the biblical merits of working for the good and steward of the land. adoption without debt. by julie gumm. practical and inspiring of how it can be done. for reals. eat and run. by scott jurek carnivore turned vegan while pursing the dream of being/becoming an ultra runner. the hobbit . by jrr tolkien i re-read it so i could go see the movie.... i opted to spend my one movie date a year on les mis .  g...

i am not sure i even know where to begin. i think i am changed. i don't think i can go backwards. i think i am on a journey..... one that god is working and unfolding. i am pretty sure he has been working on these things for more than just this summer, in fact for years, but i think the books i encountered this summer are part of moving us forward and moving us deeper.  hubbie and i have always had this heart but i realized we have been okay just saying that we could not do it "right now."  i repent. i have been lazy. i have had a hard heart.  my heart does not look like jesus. it is not okay.  i have to move toward jesus and toward others.  he is calling me to himself.....  freedom of simplicity . by richard fotster. he takes the other two books from previous post and grounds them. he completely argues that simplicity is a spiritual issue.  it is a spiritual maturity issue.  it something to be cultivated, practiced, exercised.  i k...

almost amish by nancy sleeth (one woman's quest for a slower, simpler, more sustainable life) does that sound right up my alley or what?! it was.  she takes a look at a community that has be able to stay connected to each other while remaining somewhat "out of touch" with modern culture. sleeth a makes the case that current american culture [and even modern church culture] are the ones that are out of touch not the amish.  sleeth takes ten tenants of amish culture and in a way deconstructs it, finds the merit, and challenges her reader to see what they have that we don't.  her ten things: home, technology, finances, nature, simplicity, service, security, community, families, and faith.  the ones that i really loved:  homes - aren't cluttered. technology - serves as a tool and does not rule. [i have stopped checking my cell phone or email on sundays....so mom, call my home phone] finances - save more and spend less.  simplicity - small and local lea...

the prodigal god: recovering the heart of the christian faith by: tim keller the parable of the prodigal son.... but really there are two lost brothers. and there is one redeeming father who gives a feast for those who return. to be reminded so eloquently of the father's love for me through a closer look at this parable was not only refreshing for my soul but also amazingly convicting. keller redefinition of lostness shows me the mirror to my soul taking me that much deeper in my understanding how how great my need for a the true elder brother (Jesus) who loves, obey, sacrifices, and pursues perfectly.  some quotes: the hearts of the two brothers were the same...both were alienated from the father's heart; both were lost sons.  they both were using the father for their own self-centered ends rather than loving, enjoying, and serving him for his own sake. this means you can rebel against god and be alienated from him either by breaking his rules or by keeping them dilig...

hubbie and i actually got to attend a conference a couple of weeks ago thanks to my  mom for coming up and keeping our kids. kevin twit came and spoke on how songs shape our souls . here is his article titled "why we still need hymns." he was awesome. our hymn sing was a sweet balm to my soul. here was one of the nuggets that he shared with us that i have been attached to ever since: Beams of Heaven ©2004 Christopher Miner Music.  Words: Charles Tindley.  Music: Christopher Miner. 1. Beams of heaven as I go,  through the wilderness below,  guide my feet in peaceful ways,  turn my midnights into days.  When in the darkness I would grope,  faith always sees a star of hope, and soon from all life's grief and danger  I  shall be free someday.  I shall be free someday. 2. Often times my sky is clear,  joy abounds without a tear;  though a day so bright begun,  clouds may hide tomorrow's ...

this year for lent i decided to read a biography of someone whose faith would encourage my own.  i read about amy carmichael.  a chance to die: the life and legacy of amy carmichael by: elisabeth elliot i found amy carmichael to be of the most resolute faith, but of someone who would intimidate me greatly should i ever meet in person.  she was focused and determined.... i often thought about my own faith as i read about her life and ministry of prayer....which was the point of reading about her during lent.  but i also found elliot's writing very documentary like.  i would have like it to be more narrative, a story woven around a culture and a woman whose faith remained ever steady in times of woe and sorrow. i loved how elliot would site the hymns that amy would remind herself of... and how rich the story was told through amy's own poems and letters BUT i have to say, elliot's writing was not compelling.  i guess it didn't need to be in order to con...

was full..... we had a passover meal and a good friday service. it was delightful. then an easter morning with egg hunts and friends over for lunch. can't complain at all.  strange not to celebrate with our normal brooklyn crew or a house full after service but still quite able to celebrate a risen savior. and a side note, i ran a 5K over the weekend and got my fastest time yet (28:27) for a new PR..... there was even a hill in there. i was actually second in my age group. that is just crazy! 

one thousand gifts . by ann voskamp. there are so many rich truths that she so poetically expresses in a way that make truth alive, rich, and powerful.  but it is such a raw book. there is a depth of sorrow of pain of tragedy....you almost don't want to read..... and yet, she is so honest that it is engaging and captivating in such a way that you have to keep reading.  she speaks....and my heart echos.  my heart cries out a resounding affirmation of her words. she says it like i wish i could..... and yet, there is hope.  the hope that only christ can bring.....christ the broken, crucified savior who gives thanks with his life....breaks it and then gives it away.  it is transformative.....and i pass it along to you. i'm amputated. i have hacked my life up into grace moments and cruse moments. the chopping that has cut myself off from the embracing love of a god who "does not enjoy hurting people or causing them to sorrow" (lamentations 3:33), but labo...

may all your wanderings this week, good friends, family taste the good of god and saver long -- not wolfing anything down because life is dessert and worth licking the bowl right clean.              -- ann voskamp

family..... we were having dinner with some friends just before we left brooklyn, and the husband was pouring wine into my glass that had just been used at a cocktail glass. his wife tried to get him to get out a clean wine glass..... he said, "why? she is family." sigh. i miss my brooklyn family. i miss my home. i miss my life. we have arrived in florida. and i am thankful. i got to go to a women's bible study on the book of ruth . this is what we were reading: So the two of them went on until they came to Bethlehem. And when they came to Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them. And the women said, “Is this Naomi?” She said to them, “Do not call me Naomi [which means pleasant]; call me Mara [which means bitterness], for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the LORD has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi, when the LORD has testified against me and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?” So Naomi returned, and Ruth the...

to sing his praises..... praying words would penetrate my heart.... remind me of truths.... and delight in god's love for me... glorious things of thee are spoken zion, city of our god; he, whose word cannot be broken, formed thee for his own abode on the rock of ages founded what can shake thy sure repose? with salvation's walls surrounded, thou mayst smile at all thy foes. see the streams of living waters, springing from eternal love. well supplies thy sons and daughters, and all fears of want removes. what can faint while such a river ever flows their thirst to quench? grace which like the lord, the giver, never fails from age to age. savior, if of zion's city, i, through grace, a member am, let the world deride or pity, i will glory in thy name fading is the worlding's pleasure, all is boasted pomp and show solid joys and lasting treasures none but zion's children know. -- words by john newton, 1779 amazing to think we still sing words so rich and...

she is cute and sweet and fun. but don't let that fool you. she tantrums. she kicks. she yells. she fights. she whines. she resists. and that is the state of my heart. i am fighting the idea that my plan is no longer god's plan. i had a 20 year plan that included my children graduating from high school in this house. i don't shift gears easily. church was so good for me yesterday. to be called into god's presence. to be ushered into worshiping the king. to repent of my toddler-heart. to proclaim god's goodness that endures forever. it is changing my heart....slowly.

this blogging thing is weird. how public do i get.... should i be..... when do i process....how.... etc. well, as to not emotionally vomit via the internet, i will give the bullet points of our summer: my husband resigned from his position as a church planting pastor due to financial reasons. i started packing. my husband did three weeks of home-improvement projects to get our house ready. we put our house on the market. we left on vacation without daddy..... change of plans due to implosion brooklyn. had a blast in california. changed our summer itinerary and came home by passing time in florida. had our final worship service... in our hone no less for an added sweetness. got an offer on the house....countered, accepted. un-enrolled boys from public school. started paperwork to homeschool. kids got sick. left again on vacation. kids had 10 days of stomach bug. had a awesome time at a lake in tennessee with cousins, family, and gramma. my husband had a skype interview with another chur...

we had a bit different good friday this year. it is the time to reflect on jesus.... his sacrifice, the magnitude of his love for me, the weight of my sin.... looking forward to easter and the glorious resurrection. yet, this year.... it marked the two year anniversary of my father-in-law's passing. all my in-law's were together.... we were not able to be with them. we had to carve out our own space to remember, reflect, grieve, celebrate..... we watched the video from his funeral... i miss a lot about him. these are his hands. something so memorable about him. i miss his laugh. the way he loved my kids. the way he loved me. the husband and father he was..... "may the god of hope fill you will all joy and peace as you trust in him so that you may overflow with the hope by the power of his holy spirit." -rom 15:13 happy easter.

seriously. i have not cried through a book like this since i read a severe mercy years ago. same kind of different as me . ron hall & denver moore. homeless man.... who was a sharecropper (aka slave). wealthy man..... who makes millions selling art. they become friends because of the rich wife. she loves jesus. she loves the homeless man. she gets her rich husband to love the homeless man. she dies. it is the story of their friendships, their struggles with faith, god showing up, amazing things happening..... and of course, my snippet of a post can do no justice to their story. a story of redemption. of grace. of love. of jesus. and of course i started it thinking it was a different book entirely. boy was i wrong, but glad i was. i must have heard of it since i actually requested it from the library. i figured out i had the wrong book about 30 pages into when i realized it had nothing to do with ethiopia. whoops. i love good mistakes!

okay.....not that old, but certainly not recent. a mother's heart . jean fleming (published 1982) i have been working on this book since january.... it took a while but it was worth it. i found her "dated-ness" refreshing, straight-forward, honest, and biblical. while, there were a few theological differences.... they were minor and did not deter from the heart of her book. a few good nuggest: "the single most important decision a mother can make is to develop her own life with god." (page 59) "the goal of parenting is not for us to decide what we want our children to become and then ruthlessly teach, train, squeeze, badger, and cajole them into that mold. instead, we must recognize that god has already designed them." (page 89) there were other good things that were just good reminders of thinking about my kids in term of their spiritual hearts. remembering to pray for them as individuals.....pray for myself as the mom of three individuals and the...

the kidney transplant was a success! surgery started around 10. doc came out to say hubbie was out at 3. doc came out to say kidney took and recipient was done around 4. here are some pics: pre-op: post-op with first walk around icu floor: heubert working:

surgery is in 4 days...... dear huebert, thank you for sharing life with us. we are about to give to you to someone else. it has been a pleasure having you. we hope you love your new home. we are rather fond of your new placement. i am sure he will take good care of you, but if he doesn't.... it is not our call anymore. in fact i believe you will be better appreciated in your new home. it is not that we didn't love you, we just took you for granted. i don't think he will. i think you will be loved and cherished..... have a good life, heubert. we hope you grow and flourish, but mostly, we are praying that you will help our friend. make him strong, make him healthy, make him better. see ya' round..... peace out!